Lorelei’s Blog

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To Be One June 7, 2010

Filed under: Uncategorized — lorelei21 @ 5:49 am

A certain topic often rolls around like a large bowling ball in my mind these days, knocking into every other issue or thought that exists there. That topic is unity.  There is something that I had already discovered in being filled with the Holy Spirit- that joy that comes in submitting my full life to be filled with something other than my own will.
The joy that permeates me at every moment by being in God is equal to finally knowing the essence of life.  I knew then what it meant, at least in part, to have unity in my own spirit with God. In ARC, I saw the unity that the Holy Spirit brought to a bunch of young people that was so pure and beautiful that my life felt ruined for anything less.

Then the Lord took me to Mozambique, told me there in a dark place to prepare myself, as my life was about to be approached and entered by something that I could not yet fathom.  That “something” was an incredible creation named Herbert Barbutti…. Which by the way, means “Bearded Warrior of Light.” (Incredibly accurate, right?)
The day after the Lord spoke to me, Herbert surprised me by showing up on my doorstep, ready to sweep me away… which he did successfully, and is still doing daily.=)

In this season of dating we embarked on 11 months ago, I think we have both experienced a similar breaking down and molding experience.  I would personally describe it more like having every layer of my flesh scraped back one by one and getting an opportunity to examine the strange beauty of something so complexly simple. The strangeness of it seemed hideously ugly to me at first, because I would see it with my own naked and blind eyes. Every layer is only made beautiful by God who binds us together and redeems our entire flesh, minds, hearts and spirits to be a mysterious reflection and temple of His glorious truth.  Not only was I getting peeled back layer by hideous layer, I was standing very close to the man I love who endured the very same process. I slowly learned to not jump back or judge as we faced each new layer of ourselves and each other together.  This picture may make some queasy, but the process was a messy one, and flecks of flesh would fly out or sometimes seemingly explode out onto one another during this process. Though there always seems more flesh to be found, eventually I was peeled to the bone.  At this moment, I realized suddenly that I was made of flesh! Surprise, surprise.  There, at the very naked bottom, I saw, through all the pain and weakness, that I was in such need of salvation that it seemed necessary to receive Christ all over again- but this time not only submitting to Christ, but also in full submission and naked vulnerability of the man that I love.  I need Jesus.  I love Him.  I did not feel worthy in that moment to even tell Him I loved Him or attempt to worship, but somehow I knew I wanted to offer it to Him anyway.

I am made for intimacy, as is every human.  But intimacy is different than I used to think.  I have been stripped and scraped clean by the rawness of true intimacy.  Many marriage books call it In-To-Me-See.

Unity requires intimacy which requires vulnerability which requires faith which requires love.

Thank You Jesus that You love us fiercely and that You give us to one another to be fulfilled in unity with one another.  Allow us to learn always to seek Your desires so that we may be filled to overflowing with all the fullness of God.
Every day the man that I love pours his love out on me with no reserve, and I am dumbfounded by how deeply a man can love.  Let me be freed from any earthly bounds I have put on the love You so freely gave us. I want to love deeply.

 

Blessed Battle February 6, 2010

Filed under: Uncategorized — lorelei21 @ 11:53 pm

I’m writing from Texas!  We have spent the last three days at a sweet and blessed church ministering with friends.  I am finally beginning to get a grip on this new season of life that is so utterly different than the last.  I had fleeting ideas of a season to go deep into writing music and growing in the prophetic as I dive into the Word- when I had to time to think about being Kansas City while overseas.  However, my introduction to Kansas City has been not been quite that.  It’s been a somewhat brutal season of intense healing and refining, which has felt at times like my very bones were melting under the pressure and heat.  Jesus has called His Bride to be spotless and perfect, prepared for His return, and He is making me scarless and spotless.  His grace is abundant, especially in the face of failure.

I am in a season where everything is being stripped from me spiritually, and my vision has been blurred because of pain and the only thing I could know at all times without hesitation is that I want to love the Lord with everything in me.  Now that I am stripped (at least mostly), the revelations and growth the Lord has already brought me can be restored in more purity, and there is more opportunity for the Lord to raise me to life in new places.  Submission and faithfulness are beautiful things, and things that bring us so much closer to His heart.

The Lord has shown me that I still carry childish ways in me. I lay myself down at the cross, and ask the Lord to kill me and resurrect me as a woman, leaving the childish ways behind me.

This weekend in Texas there were just four of us that were there with our friend who was the speaker for the conference, and I had never felt so inadequate on every arena as I have these past few days.  I was even struggling with worthlessness and hopelessness.  Yet every day I was asked to come and minister, to get words of knowledge and pray for the sick. After choosing not to run away, which is what I felt like doing, I knew that the only reason I could get myself to go up there was because I knew in my heart that I am as worthy in my struggle with fear and hopelessness as I was worthy when saturated in supernatural joy and boldness a few months ago.  I realized that I have nothing to lose because I have already given everything- except maybe for opportunities to grow in faith and love.  So, I spoke what I felt in words of knowledge for a couple different physical ailments, and everyone that came forward to be prayed for was at least partially, if not fully healed by the power and blood of Jesus.

I want to seek God and understand more of His nature… a Holy nature that inhabits weak and sinful, failing people.

I must keep seeking.  I must not stumble in pits of unbelief or turn towards fear, and will not let apathy catch me.  I will be victorious in Christ and in His love.  It is a battle, and I’m not afraid to admit it.

 

Support January 12, 2010

Filed under: Uncategorized — lorelei21 @ 6:36 am

Hello friends,

I am writing for a different purpose than I have written on here before.  This has never been and will not continue to be a financial support blog.  I simply write to process what I am learning in this missionary lifestyle of mine and to keep friends updated.  However, because  of prayer and seeking some counsel around me, I am writing a short note about finances.

Here in Kansas City I am on the mission field in similar ways that I was in Mozambique or the UK.  Though I am willing, I have not felt led to work full time while here.  What exactly am I doing here? I will be ministering to the homeless and prostitutes in Kansas City regularly with our missional community, auditing classes at International House of Prayer and going to the prayer room, attending university online, and working part-time. (more details to come) These are a few of the things that the Lord has led me into for this season in Kansas City.  This lifestyle leaves plenty of room for me to have faith for the Lord to provide. I have finally found a place to live, and been offered a car to borrow for 6 months, which is amazing!! But these and other living/ministering costs are more than my part time job will cover.  I know and trust that the Lord will provide for all my needs.  His provision has been beautiful and abundant in this last year, and I trust that will continue, though His provision looks different in different seasons.

If you are looking for a person or ministry to invest in once or on a regular basis and you have been following my updates and life and feel led to support me and my ministry, you can email me/ ask for address at:

email:  lorelei.lyons@comcast.net

Love and blessings to you all!!

p.s. our first outreach is Wednesday, and I will write soon about it!

 

Hello 2010 January 7, 2010

Filed under: Uncategorized — lorelei21 @ 3:33 am

Welcome to 2010.  The season has shifted, and the Lord is beginning new works and deepening the old in this year.  I seek to reveal His beauty more and more, to be strengthened in His love, and to bless Him in every way in 2010.

He is my rock, even (or should I say especially) when I am so shaken that the only thing keeping me grounded is the knowledge of His love.  The season preparing for 2010 has been a season of shaking and preparation.  Everything was unstable surrounding me: housing, transportation, money… but the main disorienting fact was that I could not feel the Lord’s presence in me as I was used to a lot of the time.  I shook and I clung and then I grew in Him during that time. It is sweet to know that there is nothing that can pull me away from Him except for my own apathy…

Kansas City has been a huge adventure already! I came back from visiting my family for Christmas and brought my little brother who is hungry for the Lord.  We experienced a huge conference at IHOP and were blessed by the deep call to devote ourselves to the fight, and he got baptized one of the nights there!  Then we had the ARC summit, where the ARC groups from VA, CA, and MI came together in a tiny apartment and shared each other’s hearts and lives for two days, focusing on what the Lord is saying.  I went away blessed and deeply convicted by the Spirit of the Lord.  It is hard to describe my conviction other than an urgent need to press into Him more than ever.   He just keeps saying, “HEED MY VOICE”, “BE ATTENTIVE TO WHAT I AM SAYING.”  This is a key season where intentionality and self control must become second nature to me in my character. It is also a time to be free to dream.  There are deep and huge visions that the Lord has grown in me that I will accomplish, but He is always growing them.  These dreams have been woven into several of my other blogs, to do with child trafficking, diamonds, and the Bride of Christ.  These dreams never die, though in some seasons they feel more dormant.  I want them to always be awake and growing, even if it is more painful that way.  The best dreams are not the ones that fall in your lap, it’s the one you would die for.  I always want to find a way more pleasing to the Lord. There are ways to live and accomplish things that are good, or better or even best.  But you can always find a way to love someone a little better than last time.  Love never fails, and if God is love, than love is eternal and more wonderful that I will ever fully understand on this side of heaven.  I want to push harder and discipline myself more to grow in that love

This is the nature of the season I have entered:  There are certain things the Lord has pushed me to focus on and grow in, like learing more guitar and continuing classes online at university, that could seem very tame and lowly after grand adventures across the world, yet I am fully excited for this season and everything in it, including the little things.  Some things don’t change, like our need for adventures and to be challenged if we want to grow.  I have so many areas of opportunity for growth and adventures here.

I am still settling on a room to rent here in Kansas City, and waiting to start my job in a couple weeks.  The Lord is so good to me, and always faithful.  I am trusting Him for much, and I know that He will always provide for me. I am in love with Him.

PLEASE PRAY:

For continued revelation of Jesus’ beautiful love at IHOP KC throughout this year, that IHOP would continued to be transformed by the renewing of their minds in Christ Jesus.

For my heart to be fully awake to what the Holy Spirit is doing and saying.

For a car here in Kansas City to be provided for me

Blessing and peace to you all=)

 

Its a Big World in Our Hearts December 12, 2009

Filed under: Uncategorized — lorelei21 @ 2:32 am

I am entering my second week of life in Kansas City. I already have much to be thankful for and many lessons learned.  The Lord has been gracious to take me into deep areas of my own life and restore things I didn’t even know needed healing.  It has been a very intense week and a half already, and I am feeling very much what a new season this is with the Lord.  It is time to let my time in Ireland be moulded and also released by Him, so that I can process and learn what I experienced there.  It is also time to embrace every part of this new season, as Jesus teaches me how to be faithful in everything that He has given me. I am letting Him to permerate every part of my life, from being in a relationship with Herbert to finding the Lord in the secret place and being sustained by Him even in normal daily life, to pursuing dreams that He has placed inside of me, even if this part looks a little more mundane or normal.  In some ways, because of the lifestyle I have chosen, normal things in life look more scary than big adventures.  I am learning to let those things go hand in hand, because every good and perfect gift comes from the Lord.  However, apathy is not my friend and never will be.  Because of this, I seek to know God’s heart more every day in every part of life.  The Lord has shattered several mindsets I had that limitted who He could be to me since I have arrived in Kansas City.  It has to do with the hugeness of His love, the extent that He can bring a person’s heart into unity with His own.  We should not underestimate the depth of our own hearts, because they reflect the infinite depth of our own Maker’s heart.  There is always more Love to recieve and to give away, and there is always time to seek Him and worship Him.  It just depends on what we are willing to sacrifice.  He is so good. I have literally felt my heart and mind stretched to a dangerous-feeling limit in the past ten days as I have seen the Lord and His great works.  There is a renewal here at IHOP in Kansas City, and He is setting hundreds of His children free, free to live in His love and joy and peace.  But for me, He is deepening roots and renewing my heart and my devotion to a deeper level than ever.

A very close friend of mine loves epic movies and themes, and loves to do epic things.  I think on some level many of us have hearts that long for an epic story: A Saviour on  a white horse, come to rescue those who suffer and mourn in death and destruction.  Sometimes I feel dramatic and a little like  a freak, because I am like my friend.  But then I remember that I am an alien, and I am also a friend of God and a daughter, a mother to the broken and a helper to those in need.  AT THE SAME TIME inside I am broken, weaker than I ever knew, more desperate than I’m comfortable with, and feeling a little lost at times.

I am looking forward with great anticipation to 2010.  Last year at this time the Lord spoke to me about 2009, saying that a tidal wave was coming. In 2009 everything I knew was uprooted and washed away, and was exchanged for deeper, higher, more beautiful heights of knowing Christ.  What a year.  Now, the Lord is continuously speaking to me of a hurricane, huge, powerful, seemingly unrelenting in 2010.  He showed me that the same world that was made new in 2009 will be shaken and poured out on in 2010.  It will hurt at times, and it will bring us from glory to glory in His peace. It will deepen roots for those who stay grounded in Truth.  God is good.  I love Him, and I will seek Him and I will know Him.   He is my anchor.  He is my hope. He is my provider.

PLEASE PRAY:

-That my heart will be strengthened in the Truth, in His presence

-For a safe drive back to Colorado from Kansas City for Christmas

-For wisdom and provision from the Lord on my current vehicle situation (driving a large, quite unreliable van in snowy weather, waiting for the Lord to provide a suitable car for my season at IHOP).

Praise Him, for He is the giver of all things good!!!!!  Thank you everybody that has given me feedback on my blog lately after being back from overseas. It is so good to know that there are friends on the other side of these words I write, reading and praying!!

 

There’s No Place Like Home in Kansas City! December 2, 2009

Filed under: Uncategorized — lorelei21 @ 4:56 am

Hello friends!
I apologize for the very long silence, as I have heard back from people that were waiting to hear how I was doing and where I am and I’m sorry to have left you all hanging. I am writing this from Kansas City, Missouri where I am staying with friends temporarily till the Lord provides housing for me to live here.
A little catch-up:
I left N. Ireland on November 15th, and traveled to Virginia Beach, VA, the place that I had left six months earlier.  I spent one short and sweet week there, reuniting and celebrating life and some early turkey with my amazing ARC family and other friends.  The Lord was showing me in retrospect more about what had been accomplished and healing me from any wounds that came from being out on the “front lines.”  He is such a wonderful God!  I also got to spend a couple days with Elissa, my precious friend of ten years, as well.  Six days after I got to the States, I headed over to Colorado to spend time with my family for Thanksgiving.  I also reunited with my amazing and handsome-as-ever (he made me put that part in) boyfriend, Herbert there in CO when my parents flew him out for Thanksgiving!  We all had a relaxing and super-fun week together, sharing stories and catching up on life.  Two days ago Herb and I packed up and headed out to Kansas City, where I will now be living indefinitely. Herbert and his sister moved here 2 months ago.  We arrived safely in Kansas City about 15 hours later than we were expecting, due to a breakdown about 6 hours into the 10-hour journey. The Lord protected and provided everything every step of the way, and now I am here!  It is a little strange to think that I will be living in one place for more than a couple months at a time, and eventually not living out of a suitcase! The Lord had spoken to me about coming to IHOP (International House of Prayer) in January 2010 earlier in the year, and I am coming out now to prepare and find a place to live.  This is a very new season and I can feel the winds of change as we near 2010.  I so love going out into the world with Jesus and ministering, and my heart is ready at any moment to go again.  For now, however, I am so excited to go deeper into the chambers of my Lord’s heart as I spend time in the IHOP prayer room and build relationship and community with those around us. I am praying about if/when to continue school, but it will definitely not be happening in January.  I am excited to experience the Lord’s provision over these next weeks.  I love these times in my faith journey where I am so aware of how abandoned and given I am to the Lord because I cannot live without His sustenance and provision.
PLEASE PRAY:
For divine growth and connections in all the new relationships here at IHOP.

For increased passion for Jesus and purity in every way in me and those who are the Bride of Christ.

For wisdom from the Lord on the many decisions I make in this new place.

For divine health.

Much love to you all!!!

 

Glimpses of Glory October 29, 2009

Filed under: Uncategorized — lorelei21 @ 1:36 am

Praises!!!!  Thank you to those that have been praying for Jason and Kellie’s church service last night! The warfare before-hand was so horrible, but then we discovered why- the Lord had great plans for the night!!  18 people showed up, I led worship, Jason preached, and then after, in perfect time, the Lord showed himself. I went to pray with a young man who was having demonic attacks of fear, and as we were praying, I felt to ask him if he had Jesus living in his heart.  He said no and that he wanted to, and so there we prayed and he invited Lord Jesus to come live inside him, and he was immediately set free of this attack that had left him shaking and with a feeling that he was blocked and frozen inside. Angels were singing and I saw the wonderful angel that came and covered my new brother’s back!  It was wonderful, and he was so filled with joy he couldn’t stand up!  Then, we also prayed for a young man who had been messing in the occult for several years, and finally decided last night that he wanted to give up these powers it had given him, and get rid of the thing living inside him.  He was completely freed and filled with the Holy Spirit, and everyone praying was filled with joy and hit by the powerful presence of God.  Thank you Jesus!!

I want to share with you guys a story of something that happened a couple weeks ago down in Belfast… This post seems to be a collection of some of my favorite moments here in N.I.! This night I wrote about was a night I have waited for for years- when I get to meet my first street Diamond, those broken women and children the Lord has so heavily shared His heart with me…

I went down to Belfast City to have dinner with this wonderful girl named Ruth-Anne, who is completely lit on fire for Jesus here in Northern Ireland. We had a wonderful time and shared our hearts and prophecied over one another. Then I had some time before I went to join Night Light ministries for the evening, and she asked if I wanted to drive around and she show me spots where she knew that prostitutes camped out, as she had worked with a homeless ministry for a few years in the area. Sure enough, we drove down around these few certain blocks, and we discovered five or six prostitutes waiting there. We parked and sat there, asking the Lord what He wanted to do or say, and then I just asked, “Lord, what do you want me to give her?” (this one woman was sticking out to me accross the street). Suddenly my hand reached up almost of its own accord, and unclasped my key necklace, the one that had been completely stuck on me  (literally wouldn’t come off, clasp was broken) for around a year. It came off easily in my hands, and I just looked at for a minute, laughing. Then we hopped out and we walked over to this woman. We introduced ourselves and asked her if we could pray for her, just a prayer of blessing for her life, and she was like, “Oh, well if its a prayer for blessing, let me tell you my real name!” Her name was Macy, and we prayed a prayer of blessing over her. Then she started talking. She was from Nigeria and she had come over with 5 other girls a few years before- they had all eventually married and apparently gotten out of this work, but she was still doing it. Her family didn’t know she did this work, and she loved Jesus very much- she said we didn’t need to tell her she shouldn’t be doing this work. Then she said, “The day I finish this work is the day I begin serving God for the rest of my life!” I gave her my key necklace and told her that it was a very special necklace to me, and it was symbolic of a new season where God was unlocking a door for her to move forward and towards Him. She gave me her number and I told her I would love to hang out sometime…. and I went away rejoicing! The Lord had given me His first Diamond, and she was just that- a Diamond in the rough. He had already placed in her a deep love for Him. I believe I will see her again soon.

Thank you Jesus for Macy and for the army You are raising up of women and children who will lead nations to Your heart because of how You heal and restore.

PLEASE PRAY:

-For a deep purifying work in the church of Northern Ireland to begin today (and all around the world for that matter)

– For us to love one another deeply, above all (1 Peter 4:8)

-For more opportunities from the Lord for us to share of the Lord’s heart for His Bride, His body: the church.

-For my upcoming weekend, when I will take a friend down to Belfast and spend the weekend doing human Treasure Hunts on Halloween (for more info, look up Kevin Dedmon) and going to a prophetic conference, ministering wherever we can.

Blessings and love over you all